Monday, December 23, 2019

These are the 4 steps to a healthy mentor-mentee relationship

These are the 4 steps to a healthy ratgeber-mentee relationshipThese are the 4 steps to a healthy mentor-mentee relationshipEvery working professional dreams of having a mentor in their field who believes in them.At their best, mentors are the senior advisors you can call on in times of crisis, the ones who guide you when you stray. Theyre thesuccessful Big Names with the clout to pluck you out of obscurity and introduce you to all the right people.Its a beneficial relationship for both the junior partner binnenseeking guidance and the senior one dispensing wisdom. Mentors get the pride and joy of helping a future star succeed, mentees get the much-needed confidence and network to succeed.But these relationships can deteriorate quickly when the mentor-mentee relationship is seen as a transaction where mentorship goes in, and success magically comes out. Usually, these relationships fail when one side doesnt see that having a mentor is a two-way street.Heres what mentors and mentees n eed to do to prevent their partnership from suring.1) Set time-management expectations from the beginningMentees need to realize that their mentors times is valuable. Mentees should not schedule a meeting at the last minute. There should be no late-night Hail Mary texts demanding career advice on whether or not they should take the job. These excessive communications do not reflect well on you, the mentee. It makes it seem as if you dont respect your mentors time.As the senior partner in this relationship, mentors should platzset the example and delineate time parameters from the beginning. Say what times and days you can be available to be contacted. Be firm that if your mentee cannot make a time, they must give at least 24-hours notice.2) Clarify what you need and what you can giveAsking for a mentor is not sending a vague, generic request to pick a successful persons brain. The foundation to a good mentee-mentor relationship begins with both sides being clear about what they want and what they can bring to the table.Harvard Business Review outlines what a mentee should know about what they want before seeking out a mentor. Do you need a coach to work through performance-related issues, a sponsor who can champion your promotion, or a connector with access to the relationships you need to do your job well? Knowing what you want is critical to not wasting yours or your mentors time.For mentors, its important to set and manage expectations from the beginning about what you can offer your mentee advice on negotiating a contract, a connection to that important person, or ongoing feedback on projects. When a mentee is being vague about goals, a good mentor will kindly ask him or her to be specific about how they can help, so that the mentor can redirect them to the right person.That means no meet-ups for career advice coffee until everyone is on the same page about what this meeting will entail.3) Facilitate the good energyMentorship should be energizing for both sides. But not everyone has the spirit to be a mentor. Not everyone has the maturity to be a mentee. Before you embark on a mentor-mentee relationship, its good to choose your dance partner wisely.For mentees, that means not being a vampire draining the life fromthemby asking many questions or sending excessive communications, according to Harvard Business Review.For mentors, that means facilitating your mentees growth and not immediately shutting down your mentees ideas. Consider the off-the-wall, ambitious idea of your mentee. Theyre entrusting you with their hopes and fears. Good mentors encourage their mentees energy. They acknowledge that their mentees success will look different from their own.4) Acknowledge the work that goes inAbove all, being a good mentor or mentee means acknowledging the work thats going into making this relationship work. For mentees, it means thanking your mentor for their advice in words and through actions.For mentors, it means going the extra mile to help bring out the best in someone. In a world where our careers are long and winding, roles can be reversed and the mentor can one day become the mentee.As journalist Ann Friedman explains this two-way street, You should always be kissing down and sideways, to the people who are going to be working alongside you and coming up behind you. Im really aware of my impending irrelevance, Friedman told the Longform podcast. I want there to be some journalist who remembers when I got on the phone with her in 2013 and helped her negotiate for her first salary and throws me a bone. I think about that moment a lot.

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